Gwen Stefani - What You Waiting For
I listen to this song, trying to get motivated to figure out what THE FUCK I’m doing. Like, I have had this vision for a cafe/bar for a long, long, long time, and it’s super scary, BUT WHEN AM I GONNA MAKE SOME MOVES? I don’t even know where to start. I am so sick of hearing the word “investors”, and I don’t know how to draft a business plan, but seriously, I better figure it the fuck out.
And so sometimes, this song is everything, except the part about the million dollar contract, or being obsessed with Japan.
It’s all so terrifying, mostly because I want to do it alone. I got an email from Megan Rascal today telling me my recipes are a huge draw onto the Vegansaurus site, and I haven’t even made anything from scratch in months. TIME TO FOCUS, time to start cooking, time to work harder than I ever have before. Mostly it’s time to stop concentrating on what I imagine to be holding me back. TICK TOCK TICK TOCK TICK TOCK.
Sometimes it’s like, work on a book, or work on opening a small business? And I get so caught up, and so freaked out, I don’t DO anything. Well, except be a BOSS at my job. The part I get stuck on is how to juggle everything? Because I don’t want to give up my job right now, but I’m not really moving forward either. Not unless we open a new location, if we ever open a new location, because the amount of work space I have to create the desserts that I do is a FUCKING JOKE. It’s stifling. BUT! I get to work in a place where MY NAME is on that dessert case. Sometimes it feels like everything I worked so hard for in Chicago. All those 14 hour days, and 6-8 day weeks led me right here. And it’s time to start moving forward again. Create something new.
The highest compliment I’ve ever been paid is being told I’m “really creative”. It’s all I want to spend my life doing - being creative.